Is that happiness?

Last two days have been more on looking inside and being with Raina most of the time that now I'm feeling mentally and physically spent. I jotted down my thoughts in between on my Blackberry to put it across here when I can...Here's one of the thought...

I’m in pursuit of pleasure. Not happiness, but pleasure. It is because sometimes it helps me forget the emptiness I feel otherwise. Most other times however, I’m simply not aware of the difference. I see the same behaviour in my MIL, my sister, my friends too. 

How do I become more aware?

Maybe I could start within understanding what each one means.

Pleasure is the easy one. Any activity that appeals to one or more of my senses and gives me joy for some time. Watching something beautiful, tasting good food, listing to music, a massage, a pleasing perfume or so goes the list. Some activities which stimulate more senses like travelling are high on the ‘want list’. One thing is certain thought, that it passes. With repetition, I become less aware of the stimuli and its effect, so I seek new stimulation in other things. So I want more and I want variety. To beat the boredom, the emptiness.

Happiness is more difficult to understanding. Its never instant gratification, but it stays as long as I’m doing the things that help the feeling stay. If I exercise I’ll feel fit and happy. If I build strong relationships, I feel fulfilled and happy. If I repeat kind acts to another, I feel happy. Every single time. However, my very nature of seeking immediate gratification makes me choose pleasurable activities over what would make me truly happy. I’m not always aware that this his how I’m choosing. Sometimes I’m just lazy.

In the book Art of Happiness, Dalai Lama advises us to constantly answer the question “Will this bring me closer to true happiness?” He encourages us to change the way we look at our decisions – moving away from seeing sacrificing pleasure as denying or withholding, and towards the idea that our discipline is moving us closer to lasting happiness.

The good thing is, every instance isn’t a trade-off. Pleasure has its place in life too !  

What do you think, Ruch?