Slowing down to speed up...Few random thoughts from the corners of my mind

My dear Ruch, 

In flurry of action packed days as they are now, my mind is at rest and thinking so many thoughts. Here is quick peek into few of random thoughts which are going in merry-go-round in my mind since sometime. 

There are times(most of the time actually) in life when I want to do so many things. There comes a stage where I feel that there are so many dreams and goals to fulfill and so little time. I think everyone reaches a stage where money is less important compared to time. I think as one grows from 20s to 30s, time is the most important need. Sometimes feeling overwhelmed with situation becomes a routine and then wonder why we are here, what are we doing, what is my purpose in life, how to I leave a mark that people will remember me for when I am long gone, Am I thinking right, how does my being me help my daughter, Am I doing enough of what I need to do, how do I(we when Harit n myself think this aloud) achieve more in less time.

I was reading a good food magazine. It was featuring a couple who shifted from France(the man is from Indian origin and his wife is from France) and both settled in Bangalore. They love to bake and dreamed of bringing the French baking style to India and so opened a bakery, which has now grown into a pizzeria. They are engineers, but followed their passion and ventured into it. It is a very inspiring story.Sometimes I feel, I should quit this corporate career and do something else like something where there is design, there is food(cooking-baking) and there is friends. And the thought lies there in corners of my mind...waiting for that leap of faith and courage....may be a person for a company is missing who can jump with me.....may be...one fine day!

When I spend more and more time with Raina, see her do activities, I want to be with her to observe few things which I probably had when I was a kid but lost in this education and corporate career. I look forward to my 'Raina's school of unlearning and learning'- RSOUL everyday. That is when the thought of time and how we can spend it more with her comes. Over past few months, I started de-clutter/unbusy my calendar to be in the RSOUL as much as possible. When someone and even myself, say I am too busy, I realise that my prioritization has messed up for the day or week. I need to stop and rethink. Now a days all I do through the day is read a lot, talk to new people about our business, do my job(mostly night time I sit and work when Raina sleeps), and spend all the time with Raina. I feel at peace. I keep learning when I am not practicing. My to do list is still there, but on hold, or few things have become not important any more and they will disappear from the list soon without attending it. In the evening when we all(kids and mommies/nannies) come out of our house for playtime, I see some mommy, waiting for the play time to get over fast and get on with the next task. When I ask them, they sound so busy, it scares me. They don't like what they are doing, yet doing it for money(guessing) and miss being with their children. When given a chance to spend time with them, they are thinking of the next to-do things. They look at their children growing but never see them grow. They hear but never listen to their child's words or demands. They are there but never present. I was there too when Raina was too small. But the realisation dawned early and I changed drastically. Many who know me as career woman would be surprised that I changed so much. I have calmed down (I feel). I have so much time! I think being busy was never anyone's goal. Being unbusy is our goal. Unbusy is the key to freedom, happiness and joy of living. 

A close and wise friend of ours told us, "Slow down to speed up".  It is a powerful statement when practised. One of the things on our to do list is to slow down, think, relax and rejuvenate and come back to the task.

In the process of slowing down, I mostly start with gratitude. It is one of the most powerful emotions one can use to bring all-good into our life in absolute abundance. It dissolves all negativity and transforms life into total joy. First I was verbalising and writing here and there on paper/mobile notes since a few years and see powerful effects in my life. So now I am also maintaining a gratitude diary. More on this in another post....Waiting for few words from you on your blog..whenever you can..


Take Care Ruch.


Love
Mon.